Weekend

With the change of the seasons, I became a little bummed out and generally irritated with everything over the weekend.  So, I took it easy and luckily Bobaloo had plans that involved him leaving the house so he didn't have to endure my sniveling and crankiness too much.  I stayed in, watched movies, picked up the house, and just tried to mellow the heck out.  I kept my contact with outside humans to a minimum.  Just like December, June seems to be a difficult and moody month for me.  I think it's the heat and all of the hustle and bustle of summer.  Along with all of the fun comes a lot of people and a lot of stimulation.  Yikes.  Too much.  Just not in the mood for that business.

On a brighter note, almost every day I have been sticking to some small goals:

• drink a lot of water
• get out into the sunshine
• walk and listen to music
• eat fruits and vegetables
• get 3 things done around the house each day

Small things, I know.  But small things are helping this cantankerous soul out.

I did end the weekend happily by having some delicious grilled foods with Bobaloo and Aaron in the backyard last night.  I tried making barbecue tofu skewers for the first time and they were a hit (with me, the men ate meat).

So there we have it.

Still moving, just needed to slow down for a minute.

in the can

Bobaloo doesn’t have the greatest luck.  I don’t know if it’s so much luck as weird stuff happens to him on the regular.  When we were dating he used to tell me stories of the strange everyday occurrences that would happen to him, I of course, thought he was exaggerating.

When we moved in together we always worked wonky schedules so here and there I would notice goofy interactions or the world messing with him.  It wasn’t until we got married, had similar work schedules, and started only using one car that I noticed all the weird crap that happens to him on a semi-daily basis.  Honestly there are times I dread pulling into the 7-11 because there is going to be some kind of tomfoolery happening that is going to make a 2 minute stop stretch to 10.  It seems to be that all of these weird little things add up to the microcosm of his life.  It’s hard to explain, so here are a few examples:

*He constantly gets strange change back (half dollars, two-dollar bills, Sacajawea coins).  The change isn’t from just one establishment either, this happens all around town.

*I joke that we can get anywhere 15 minutes faster if I drive because he will hit every.single.red.light.

*He always gets the wobbly bar stool.

*His food order always gets mixed up or has missing items.

*This post would take days if I went on with the list.

Usually his weird destiny doesn’t throw my stuff off but every once in a while, I am there to not only witness it, but participate (unwillingly).

A recent experience was a trip to Wal-Mart to buy a trashcan for the kitchen.  We made our way to the home section and they had an entire aisle of garbage cans in different materials, colors, etc.

We weren’t looking for anything too fancy, maybe just a $20 Rubbermaid with a lid.  Did you know they sell garbage cans for $80?  Well, we were sticking to the frugal choice.  Find a can, find a lid, and get out of there. 

We found a few that we liked but were unable to find one with a lid that fit.  Now, there were a lot of garbage cans and a lot of lids, what are the odds that not one thing would fit another in the entire aisle?  It dawned on me that I was shopping with Bobaloo and this was about turn into one of his weird things that happen only to him.  That saying, “no matter how crooked the pot, there’s always a lid that fits” certainly did not apply.  They even had labels with letters on them to help match a set up.  Bobaloo would pull out Cans J, C, and T and I would only find lids for G, P, and H.

We just wanted a garbage can.  After about ten minutes of maddening amusement we gave up and left with no trashcan.

The Bus Ride

Coughing, wiping, sneezing, scratching. Gum chewing, cell phone talking, eating, and drinking. Snot, vomit, smiles, frowns, bitching. Chatting, napping, and wheezing. Disgusting and peaceful. Playing, drunk, and eating. Awake and working. Excitability and trudging along. Reclining, leaning, snoring, headphones, and upright.

Da Plague! Da Plague!

My dad compares giving two weeks notice to having the plague. I agree. The first few days have been somewhat awkward. I planned a “Pie Day” for Friday, hopefully that will ease the rigidity. It is probably one of those scenarios where people hate change in the landscape of every day life. I cannot say I contribute too much to the office except for a little humor and well, pie.

Oh well.

I am very excited about the move now because everything is lining up as well as possible. My mom is going to fly to Denver and road trip with me to San Diego. Woo-hoo! She is referring to the road trip as, “Jill and Mom’s excellent adventure.” Wow. I will be sure to bring the camera for this.

Yay.

I am proud to announce that this morning is the last time I will ever scrape my windshield. I really hate getting up earlier to do that. People should not have to preheat their cars; it should be a rule or something. Navigating the frozen roads with ice-covered idiots driving frantically is the worst.

Grumblings and Ramblings

I am feeling a bit tired and salty as of late. So in that vein, here's a list of the top 8 irritations in my life:

1. The guys who work at Valvoline (no, I don't want a stupid air filter).
2. Waitresses in a hurry and make me order something I don't want to eat.
3. People who say "thanks much" or write "thanx" instead of "thanks." It's one extra letter!
4. People who call only to put me on hold.
5. Slow baristas.
6. $180 Textbooks.
7. The Gap.
8. Blank pages.
9. Writing when there's nothing to write about.
10. Writer's block because I haven't been anywhere or done anything lately.

I am kind of dissapointed in my posts lately. They have been barely mediocre. I started up another semester at school and am taking many writing classes so I am hopeful that from now on my posts will be both thrilling and thoughtful! My first creative writing assignment was to write a short story in exactly one hundred words. I encourage you to give it a whirl; it is kind of fun. Here it is:

The man could not believe that after thirty-five years it was over. However, by the gray in her face and the snarl in her hair he could tell it was true this time. The cold way she told him to get out left him exasperated, yet relieved.

He ambled down to Market Street and made a decision. The man pulled of his sullied fedora, reached into his pocket, and pulled out creased dollars. The money passed to a man selling yellow roses.

The man walked back up the street to her knotted wooden door and knocked. She was already gone.

**Now that I read the story again, it is kind of a downer. I need happier posts, I think

***For a happier post on inauguration party hilarity check out this by The Bloggess.

Connie, My Cranky Alter Ego Has A Cream Cow

Bobaloo and I celebrated our three-month anniversary last Sunday. To make merry, we had some leftover gift cards from the wedding to spend. We should not be allowed to leave our house. Ever. Someone could get hurt. Don’t get me wrong I like to shop however, places such as Bed, Bath, and Beyond and Pier One Imports are a little out of our league. For us, this means both dangerous and new territory. Bobaloo signed up for this expedition so there were no excuses or complaining allowed by him.

When we shop together, it is strange. We are almost telepathic which both helps and hinders our shopping experience, either way it is certainly enhanced. We both get annoyed at the same time and at the same things. When we really get going, you can feel our combined blood boiling to Mt. Vesuvius proportions. Moreover, we exchange exasperated looks that scream, “Let’s get the hell out of here.” Usually after a particularly perilous shopping trip, we end up drinking. See: Mall Trip at Christmastime 2007.

We are polite, courteous people. It just seems whenever we are out so is every idiot on the face of the planet. And, I truly mean every idiot. I am sure occasionally we are the aforementioned idiots, although we always move to the side of a store if we need to chat, we do not bump people in the back of the heels with shopping carts, and we do not have spoiled temper-tantrum-having babies with us. We do not just stop and leave our cart in the middle of an aisle. Or stalk people for parking spaces in the parking lot. When we go out, it seems like we are seeing the decline of common courtesy right before our eyes.

We started our super-extreme-fun shopping day at Barnes and Noble, which was pleasant. We had coffee and separated to find our own books in our own interest section. We soon left to walk over to Bed, Bath, and Beyond. We are smokers. Yep, disgusting, drudge of the earth smokers. However, we are also polite smokers. After Barnes and Noble, we moved a ways away from the entrance of the store to light up. It was just us, our cigarettes, and a wall separating two stores. Dumbass daddy decides his kids should play right in front of us. Making me feel immediately guilty, but at the same time, what the hell dude? It is called second-hand. So the cig was short-lived and we made it to BBB.

We made it to Barnes and Noble, Bed, Bath, and Beyond, and Target. The crescendo of the day though, was Pier One.

Top 5 reasons we should not be allowed in Pier One:

1. Did you know “tweens” think Pier One is cool and frequent there? Weird. “Tween” girls that shop at Pier One freak me out. This post about Pier One has me using the word, “tween.” Ugh.
2. There is a lot of glass. A lot of glass. Glass + Bobaloo + Me / Pier One = Catastrophe.
3. I had to convince Bobaloo that we needed new glasses because the chipped free-with-a-bloody ones from college just are not cutting it. In the end, he gave in. He probably gave up because he wanted to leave. Either way, I am taking that win!
4. The woman at the counter was not very nice. Even though I lied about not having an email address, she should not get all persnickety. I doubt I am the first person she has encountered who doesn’t want Pier One harassing them. Not to mention that I had “I am not a regular customer” written all over me.
5. With a $25 gift card you can either buy one cool thing or all sorts of random objects such as eight glasses and a creamer cow.

Top one reason you should shop at pier one:

1. $5.00 Creamer cows. Don’t act like you’re not impressed.